Thats my story

This is a serious blog. No Exclamation Marks will be found. And I ask that you dont feel sorry for me but please read with a heavy heart:(

My name is Derek and I Have a Learning Disability. If I were at one of the L.D. (learning disorder/ disability for those who dont know) meetings that is what I would stand up and tell the group of fellow handicap's. I have no shame in admitting my disability. I want no special treatment or even to be looked at differently by normal brained individuals. I just want to be Believed. Now, you should know that I have not been diagnosed by a certified physician, nor have I ever met with someone who would be able to test the seriousness of my learning disability. I came to the conclusion myself through living with this condition my whole life, as well as, searching Learning Disabilities over Google and MSN search engines. Here's My story.



Growing up in the sun soaked city of White Bear Lake I always knew there was something wrong with me. Excuse me, there was something Special about me. From the beggining I was very shy and quiet. I never talked much especially in the presence of strangers. I wanted to talk but the problem was the words werent there for me to communicate properly. This goes for school as well. I would want to show my teachers how smart I was but the ideas in my head couldnt funnel down into speakable form. I would soon panic and my mind would blank out on me. My eyes shifting around, praying now that I wouldnt be called upon to answer a question. When I was called upon My mind scrambled for words to explain what I already knew. What Im saying is that I often know the answers but when I need to explain it, I CANT.

Because of this disability I spoke little and listend alot growing up. Now that I speak more Ive noticed other issues going on. I often speak sentences out of order (My sentences are constructed alot like Yoda i think). For Example, "Use the Force We Must." Its very frustrating for me to speak like that because it confuses the heck out of me, and then I lose track of what I was talking about. Another issue is that I tend to mix words around. For example, I mean to say "Ticket Checking" but instead it comes out as "Chicket Tecking." Or "Stop Light" Becomes "Light Stop." Those are two of many examples I have. This Happens all the time.

Now you may say "this happens to me too." Well You know what IT DOESNT. OK. This is serious. I need help Now. It may be Dyslexia or some Spatial Abstract problem, But the point is Its a problem Im willing to work on. I have it I except It. I just need to be directed or put in contact with someone who can help me contain,if not cure my disability. Because No Learning Disability site I found online allows me to do it over the internet. That makes me SO MAD.

So as you can see I wasnt shy and quiet because that was the way I was born. No. It was Because of this stupid Learning Disability all along. And I think I know what caused it. Probably from being dropped on my head when I was a baby. I was fragile at that age.